No matter how hard I tried, I couldn’t seem to get my son Matthew on a healthy eating program. I saw the amazing effects diet had on Charlie and wanted Matt to benefit too. But Matt’s ADHD presented differently than Charlie (Matt wasn’t SO bad!) so I’d often give up the food battles to keep the peace.
While focus, impulsivity and hyperactivity where Charlie’s challenges, Matt struggled with his temper. His ADHD actually took a backseat to his ODD (Oppositional Defiant Disorder) behaviors. He could be so sweet, silly and empathetic one minute, then angry and erratic the next. I read every book on the subject and became well versed in dealing with The Explosive Child, but solutions didn’t last.
It broke my heart to hear how remorseful Matt was after an outburst. He’d always apologize and often cry saying he ‘just couldn’t stop the anger’ when it came. And boy did it come. Both at home and at school, Matt could get so frustrated to the point of boiling mad. He found ways to compensate at school by completely freezing in place. His classmates and teachers knew to give him time to cool off but this certainly wasn’t the way to live.
Quite frankly, I was baffled at the inconsistency of Matt’s outbursts. Things that might set him off one day seemed to be no problem on another. Like living with Jeckyll u0026amp; Hyde.
By age 11, Matt’s physical health also started taking a hit. Severe joint aches, heart palpitations and frequent headaches were becoming the norm. When I thought perhaps Lyme’s was at play, a full blood workup provided a clean bill of health. Once again I was left scratching my head. Matt was a code I couldn’t seem to crack.
We tried biomedical intervention as a last resort and I was hopeful the ADHD and ODD would loosen their grip. The medicine certainly helped with classroom focus and homework completion but the anger remained constant. Unfortunately, the sweet and empathetic side of Matt practically disappeared while on medication which left him feeling robotic and emotionless. I was at wit’s end trying to help our son.
Little did I know things needed to get worse before they could get better.
The family took a long awaited trip to Disney World and I loosened the reigns on everyone’s eating. I watched as Matt indulged in his favorite foods and strawberry smoothies— All. Day. Long. I noticed he was edgy but figured this was expected with long days, poor sleep and too much sugar. What I didn’t expect was the ‘zero to 60’ angry outbursts that required us to keep Matt separated from his siblings. More alarming were the strange behaviors that emerged. Over the course of a week, Matt had begun incessantly twitching his nose and blinking his eyes. Even stranger was the development of a slow swirling of his lower arms, wrists and hands. Lastly, his once beautiful singing voice was now hoarse with laryngitis. It was as if a switch had been flipped, and Matt was going downhill. I actually looked forward to getting home so these strange effects would fall away.
But once home, he only got worse.
In the coming weeks, the twitches, tics and wrist swirling worsened and his voice remained hoarse. Headaches and joint aches were now common. If this weren’t bad enough, his short fuse was growing shorter. I literally fell asleep one night with no tears left to cry. What. Was. Happening?
The Answer to Oppositional Defiant Disorder Behaviors
And then, as clear as if spoken to me, I awoke with the answer. It was the overload. The dairy, gluten, sugar, red dye, the processing. Matt’s brain was on fire.
I recalled a time in 3rd grade when Matt was home sick with the stomach flu. He was so sweet and peaceful for those days and I attributed it to his lack of energy. But now I knew it was his empty stomach that gave him a reprieve and made him so calm. I decided to try an experiment— Whether Matt liked it or not, I would take authority over what he ate for the next two weeks. My hypothesis was that he was NOT a child with anger issues. Instead, he was a sweet, compassionate child with severe food sensitivities and possible nutrition deficits.
The transformation was miraculous.
I stripped his diet like I had done to Charlie years earlier with the goal to re-balance his gut. And because Matt was terrified at the development of these strange tics, twitches and voice loss, he was willing to try anything to get his old self back. I was hoping for positive change, but the completely calm child who emerged on day 4 took my breath away.
His demeanor was calm, his features were soft, and he wasn’t on ‘high alert’. Then by day eight, his voice came back strong and smooth. By day 14, his twitches and ticks fell away, and headaches and joint aches became a thing of the past. The swirling wrists were the last to heal taking almost three months.
The journey to keep Matt on a regimented diet continues and can be a struggle at times.
What teenager can always say no to pizza, ice cream and chips? But when Matt slips on diet, his anger and behaviors slowly return. He prefers not to take medication and knows he must compensate through diet, supplementation and the mindfulness to Respond rather than React. More important he knows what a ‘calm brain’ vs ‘fiery brain’ feels like and knows he is in control of achieving the former if he watches what he ingests.
You’d think of all people, I would not be surprised by the amazing outcome that food and nutrition has had on my child but I am.
Matt had presented so differently from Charlie that I didn’t consider identical root cause. A healthy diet excluding triggers (gluten, dairy, corn, refined sugar, preservatives and dyes) along with vitamin supplementation has given me my child back. My story is not unique but it’s one I share in the hopes it may illuminate a solution for you.
Carolyn offers encouragement and knowledge so other moms can experience the same successful results as her son. One of her older sons, also ADHD, struggled for YEARS with O.D.D. symptoms. She wants you to know you can have control over symptoms even when given that VERY overwhelming ADHD or O.D.D. diagnosis.